Monday, January 12, 2009

Episode 109 - "Holy Harkov!"

PCX reviews Marvel Presents #7
(part 3 of 3)

34 Comments:

OpenID vichussmith said...

Trenchcoat, you must have lost your mind when at the end of the first Runaways series, the group brought a little abused mutant from the past, who just happened to be the same age as Molly Hayes. She's still in series 2. She has the power to command plant life. I'm guessing this would help you to write your BDSM Runaways slashfiction.

January 12, 2009 7:44 PM  
Blogger MCTREKKIE said...

I keep saying this.

Stop encouraging the Trenchcoat!

I am ashamed that I laughed out loud at the ABC's of Pedophilia...

Ashamed, I say!

I am calling the authorities now and turning myself in.

Funny- not even the mightsy Starhawk could contain T Mafia in this one- The first son of Podon sounded almost as exasperated as I usually get.

Oh, and rather than that cripple Barbra Gordon or Tigra, I vote for Wanda Maximoff (but only if I'm Pietro and only if we're of age. Incest is comics code approved, after all) BUT I don't think that Pedophila is ok even in the Ultimate Universe.

January 12, 2009 10:29 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Horny ten-year-old girls?
They don't even know what sex is!!

Until Dr.Doom showed me.
So I agree with the part about girls should be with older guys.

The ABC's of pedophilia was funny

Courtney

January 13, 2009 1:41 AM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

To the "One Who Thinks He Knows," To paraphrase a Nazi Germandy survivor - "In the US they came first for the pedophiliacs, And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a pedophiliac;

And then they came for the incestuous, And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t an incestuous;

And then they came for the kiddie porn producers, And I didn’t speak up because I wasn’t a kiddie porn producer;

And then . . . they came for me, an ass rapist . . . And by that time there was no one left to speak up."

January 13, 2009 3:55 PM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

In ref to the previous episode. (I took a few days off cause I couldn't trust myself not saying anything incest like and scaring Courtney from listing her 5.)

I always found Nikki, annoying. She pretends she's a strong person but she's always needy. She was even more annoying than the skrull kid they get later into the team. Yes, she burns people with her pussy when having sex, Charlie-27 mentions it in the 90's series when they were sex partners.

Figure Nikki's species would have mutated fire lice. And to rape Nikki, simply get her in the shower or tub, or go for romantic rape and do her under a waterfall.

Kiddie porn sorta sucks cause they are worse than amateurs at times. It's like, "What's going on? Where am I? I want my mommy." Boring.

Empowered is also boring to me, it's not even soft porn, no nakedness. It's like cabaret, hints at nakedness, but not gonna happen. And bad simulated manga.

January 13, 2009 6:13 PM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

First off I have further proof that the Chinese are taking over. Half of the responses on my Holiday themed killing spree poll are for Buddha. Hate to say it this way cause I might sound racist, but that does seem a bit chinky to me.

Note, again - Step, adopted or inlaws is not incest.

Don't forget the mutant power dampeners shackles when grabbing Molly. Mutant power dampener shackles - 5 out of 5 Rogue's rapists approved. (Never understood why Rogue, didn't just use mutant power dampeners if she wanted to fuck. Cyclops must uses ruby quartz speed swimming goggles when going down on women.)

I would have figured that a thousand years into the future, trans-sexuality wouldn't be a stigma. Or does that mean Kingsley and his closeted gaggle won?

CPM? Why is that name so familiar?

Actually Vichus, if I remember correctly, the Bush administration began trying to restrict all porn because of it's "association" with child porn. Then luckily 9/11 happened and they got busy making money in blood, oil, drugs and guns

No incest in regular cartoons? Have you ever seen Tiny Toons? "I'm Babs Bunny." "I'm Buster Bunny." "No relation." Heh, guess they don't know Bugs Bunny that well, do they?

Things that make me go hmmm... Courtney is into anything robotic.... Jordan has a robotic voice... hmmm...

Toonphilia, eh? I'm starting to think that was my first fetish, Judy, Pebbles, Cindy Bear, Josie and the Pussycats, so tasty.

To combine all of TCM's females, all you need is a 10 year old Mystic.

Okay, I think I'm up to date now.

January 13, 2009 6:35 PM  
Blogger MCTREKKIE said...

Xantes- CPM is short for Chinese people mocker.

Actually I think it was Khan that gamed your system and Voted for Buddha. An evil Fortune cookie must have told him to do so.

10 year old Mystique? Ewww. Can she morph into someone older and Legal that just looks young?

I dunno. Call me old fashioned. I like me a woman that looks like a woman- not a scared young thing.

Lets be mindful of the line here gang. Consensual Adult Incest, for all its supposed faults, is legal in Rhode Island and the Netherlands... (sort of?) But pics of naked little kiddies? I'm afraid to even research that one. Blech!

Call me a sanctimonious child porn buzz kill, but I vote that we let kids just be kids a little while longer... Bad enough we send 'em to war too soon, and too young.

January 13, 2009 7:43 PM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

Who said scared young thing? Ask yourself, how old were you when you realized you wanted to stick your wee-wee into a girl? Or atleast feel one up? When did girls start flirting with boys? Like I said, I was a 10 year old doctor.

January 13, 2009 11:26 PM  
Blogger MCTREKKIE said...

Playing Doctor is fine. It's when one is old enough to be a real doctor and still thinking of kids as sexy that the trouble starts.

Paraphrasing Starhawk- let the kids play with the kids

As for me? I had a VERY long Latency period - I'm still trying to figure out where all the parts are, and I've been on the planet for 4 decades.

January 14, 2009 11:07 AM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

What? Can't I now specialize and be a pediatrician?

Now for something completely different.
Thor.

Thor.

January 14, 2009 7:03 PM  
Blogger T Mafia said...

Vichus - I gave up on Runaways right before Whedon's last ish -I mean, how long do they expect me to wait between issues? All I know is there was a time when the Marvel train used to run on time.

Also, I'm assuming we're talking about the little girl married to the old guy who (correctly) expected to perform her *cough* wifely duties; and even though I would like to see some hot ten-year-olds-on-each-other action, I'm offended that the Runaways would impose their own decadent 2008 values on the kid and "save" her (what about the innocent pedo husband?!) in the first place.

Trekkie, There is no "line"! In fact, speaking of pedophilia, I have two words for you: Hal Jordan (Google "Arisia"; and yes, I'm ignoring the age retcon another, lesser writer inflicted on that character later on.)

Courtney, Thanks for giving us the last word on this matter by pointing out that Dr. Doom has a thing for young girls; after all, who among us dares question the wisdom of Doom?!

Xantes, I get why you resist the "funny" label, but then you come up with stuff like "mutated fire lice" which is not only hilarious, but makes perfect sense.

Also, I agree that kiddie porn actresses need to step up their game.

I'll probably keep reading Empowered until they finally explain why we can't see camel toe through her insanely tight suit.

re: Rogue - On a related matter, one writer wanted to subtly reveal that the girl owns an extensive dildo collection (because of course, she would!), but for some reason Marvel Editorial squashed the idea.

Is it wrong that I was annoyed Babs Bunny didn't actually touch herself in your video?

January 15, 2009 9:37 AM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

I haven't read those Runaways with the 12 year old Rose Red. But it seems that her husband treated her wrong from the beginning. Marriages shouldn't start off abusive from the word, "do."

He should have been nice, caring, gentle. Shown her love, eased her into sex. Slowly changed her world view that he was her everything. Then slapped her around, but give her the perception it was her fault and that he only throws her down the stairs because she needs the abortion and that just means love.

I'm sure there's some Runaway fan
porn artwork out there. It's getting harder to locate easy though.

Yeah, I was disappointed the Babs clip didn't finish out. I need to check that guy's deviant artwork and see if he has more or has a more complete version.

Actually I think Rogue used to do some late night sessions in the Danger Room. Set on gang rape.

I always found the whole Gambit/Rogue love/can't touch issue boring. Wear a full cover bodysuit, use power dampeners, use the Danger Room to make it seem like you are having sex together, wear a condom, have Leech in the room, etc.

I just remembered what I found the most surprising thing about your review of Marvel's future. You didn't point out they already know the legacy of Ironman's evil.

Only he could have inspired a whole race of purple skinned aliens to use his tech and drag fascism into the future.

January 15, 2009 11:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=klmfFA1SiXE

Courtney

January 15, 2009 11:42 PM  
Blogger T Mafia said...

Xantes, The Stark, you say? Yeah, that was the 90s, though; a decade of comics so unreadable I try to pretend most of that stuff never happened. Or in this case, is gonna happen.

Courtney, There you go. Although to be fair, the little girl singing "My Humps" isn't asking to be raped. No. That bitch is begging to be raped!

January 16, 2009 2:58 AM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

I forget, did I post this one? How about this one?

January 16, 2009 12:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I couldn't see the other one, but I laughed so hard at the eHarmony video. Hey, it's Trenchcoat and I!

Courtney

January 17, 2009 2:56 AM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

Why not? Is it cause the age restriction? If you been listening to the show I told you about it's the "Sweet daddy bear" clip.

Which couple do you see yourself as? Is it the one with the guy wearing the Legionnaire shirt? Thought you might not like it cause it implies incest at the end.

January 17, 2009 10:03 AM  
Blogger T Mafia said...

I gotta see the TV-movie the first clip is from. And Xantes, that guy with the Legion shirt even skeeved me out. The end, on the other hand, makes the whole thing just perfect.

January 17, 2009 8:08 PM  
Blogger MCTREKKIE said...

You all need to calm down... you are all TOO fired up-

I therefore suggest the following video remedy-

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRsN2pftgvc

Name that 70's Porn!

PS- I Can name that porn in 4 notes...

January 17, 2009 8:08 PM  
Anonymous pcxStarhawk said...

Novice!

If you really wanna calm down the masses, subject them to 5:18 of THIS! BAT PUSSY: Worst Porn Ever (SFW Edit)

Spoiler Alert:
Starhawk finds it hillarious EVERY time she hobbies into a scene.

- Starhawk
In.Tears

January 17, 2009 8:15 PM  
Blogger T Mafia said...

Trekkie, I watched your porn and I'd say, "Now, that was just silly", only I can't because I did LOL at the lesbian "playing the bongos".

Speaking of lesbians (as we skip the usual week between PCX reviews), be on the lookout for Vixen's new Podcast XXX episode tomorrow; she'll be reviewing a comic featuring more dykes than you can shake a double-headed dildo at.

Starhawk, I'll watch your porn, but for some strange reason I'm pretty sure I'm gonna regret it...

January 17, 2009 8:22 PM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

The movie is called Child of Rage. It seems like it has a moral majority "happy" ending.

Ron Jeremy has betrayed us.
I mean, what's the harm.

What's the movie, MCTrekkie?

I keep forgetting I've seen that clip of Batpussy so many times. It's like my brain erases it everytime. I do what to one day see the whole thing just to see if it's all bad.

January 17, 2009 8:56 PM  
Anonymous pcxStarhawk said...

BP: How could it NOT be all bad? Hell, Starhawk is hard pressed to believe that it is even actually contains PORN.

- Starhawk

January 17, 2009 9:11 PM  
Blogger MCTREKKIE said...

What we need is a Porn-stravaganza Jeopardy Contest

I'll take the 70's

Starhawk can take the 80's

Xantes and Vichus can take the opposing team and choose their decades as well.

Trenchoat can moderate, run the buzzer, and catch up on his 90's Image comics. Isn't that porn too?

Reminder- Answers must be in the form of a question

Losers get the special "GITMO" buzzer- which, when activated sends a not so mild shock to the no-no place when a question is answered incorrectly.

PS

None of that new fangled Manga Hentai ... what the hell is the point of that anyway? Just like regualar manga it all seems to start with the orgasm and work backward.

January 17, 2009 9:40 PM  
OpenID vichussmith said...

Well, I would be a late 70s to 90s porn guy. I think those are my golden years of porn. UI also specialize in black porn stars.

For example, name these black porn stars:

Probably the dirtiest black porn star around

Black porn star
with the best breasts


most physically fit black porn chick

January 17, 2009 11:39 PM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

WARNING - THIS MESSAGE CONTAINS SOME REALLY FUCKED UP SHIT!

NO REALLY CHECK HER REACTION.

Do you really want to have a contest?

If we have this, is it to gross out or turn on? I'm taking my cue from the Batpussy vid.

January 18, 2009 10:56 AM  
Blogger MCTREKKIE said...

Ok We've officially Pornjacked the blog. The power of Podon is mighty indeed!

Xantes- I just don't know what was more disturbing - the chick with the fake nails waving her abc gum around talking about how nasty the dude is as he takes it up the butt, or the guy actually taking it up the butt.

You and Vichus need your own PCX spinoff. Skype is a wonderful thing.

I would listen to that the moment it airs.

I'm a lightweight compared to you guys, I think- I still get turned by "Barbarella", "1 million years BC", and Tribble Porn.

January 18, 2009 9:20 PM  
Blogger T Mafia said...

Trenchoat can moderate, run the buzzer, and catch up on his 90's Image comics. Isn't that porn too?

For Starhawk, definitely, in that all those bitches had M cups like Power Girl.

January 18, 2009 9:59 PM  
OpenID vichussmith said...

Uh, I don't think you've captured the essence of this porn competition, Xantes.

Now, the queen of incest.

January 19, 2009 9:08 PM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

You mean this? I'm waiting til the parameters are established.

Like are game shows allowed?

What about japanese ones?

January 20, 2009 1:39 PM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

Happy Hamster sex?

Trekkie?

January 21, 2009 9:13 AM  
Blogger MCTREKKIE said...

EVERYONE MUST CLICK XANTES' "TREKKIE?" LINK ABOVE.

huh.

And all this time I thought the internet was for PodCasting and spreading rumors about how bad the next Star Trek reboot movie is gonna be.

So "Trekkie" speaks like Yoda and sounds like Cookie Monster?

I am now hunting down the original- but the sailor moon vid makes it.

Tears of laughter and shame fill my new Florida locale - The "Condo of distress"

January 21, 2009 12:45 PM  
Blogger MCTREKKIE said...

Oh- it's from Avenue Q. Duh.
anyhow- here is the original

http://www.youtube.com/v/T-TA57L0kuc&hl=en&fs=1

January 21, 2009 12:53 PM  
Blogger XantesFire said...

PCX: The Classics Tour.

TCM's Top 5-
Honorary mention- Beverly
5. Gwen Stacey-lobotomy
4. Mystique-faceless
3. Oracle/Barbara Gordon-helpless
2. Molly-Haze young
1. Tigra-cat bitch


Is Alley-Kat-Dabra too beastial?
XantesFire top 5-
Honorary-"pre-crisis just landed on Earth" Supergirl
Honorary- Jade(so green)
Honorary- XS(Yummy)
5. Cheetara-quick and furry
4. Dawnstar-Wings and looks so tasty
3. Andromeda(Laurel Gand)- future Supergirl
2. Jenny Wakeman-for the possible attachments
1. Mary Marvel-one word and she's underage again

Again, he is adopted, boring from the incest POV.

Well Aleta does divorce StarHawk and goes to Vance when he gets out of his suit.

I forgot all about this contest stuff. It feels like it was just yesterday.

August 13, 2011 11:32 AM  

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