Episode 151 - "Let's cut his BALLS off!"
PCX reviews Kick-Ass #2 & Madame Xanadu V2 #16Thursday, July 15, 2010
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- Episode 1 - Podcast Macht Frei
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- Episode 6 - Godcast X
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- Episode 8 - Beneath the Podcast of the Apes
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- Episode 34 - Meanwhile, at the Hall of Justice...
- Episode 35 - Voulez Voodoo? II
- Episode 36 - Pedocast X
- Episode 37 - Back in the USSR
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- Episode 39 - Catch-52
- Episode 40 - "The government is NEVER wrong, about ANYTHING!"
- Episode 41 - "You're RUDE and OFFENSIVE, Guy Gardner."
- Episode 42 - "Yes...I'm...uh...due on patrol, anyway!"
- Episode 43 - "Your butt looks big in those giant pants."
- Episode 44 - "No hope at all."
- Episode 45 - "Where the ghost men are."
- Episode 46 - "Can a man DO such a thing?"
- Episode 47 - "Truck."
- Episode 48 - "UNHAND ME, MORTAL!"
- Episode 49 - "So much for that clown!"
- Episode 50 - "Enough of your maudlin self-pity!"
- Episode 51 - "I will suffer your impudence--NO MORE!"
- Episode 52 - One day, in the 30th century, five super-animals frolic through the void...
- Episode 53 - "We may be ANIMALS...but we're too GENTLEMANLY to battle girls!"
- Episode 54 - "Velly clever!"
- Episode 55 - "Dammit, Venom's going to eat him."
- Episode 56 - "Every time I kill someone, I become more like God."
- Episode 57 - "I'm busy bleeding."
- Episode 58 - "Fake volcano too much?"
- Episode 59 - "My powers of seduction are irresistible."
- Episode 60 - "They're STUPID...but DANGEROUS!"
- Episode 61 - "I was just going to use that cucumber to make a salad, honestly."
- Episode 62 - "When I press your lips with mine, my darling, you will know that I am really real!"
- Episode 63 - "Let me clue you IN, Billy Graham--there is no God!"
- Episode 64 - "I will eat my rabbits ALONE!"
- Episode 65 - "Ah don't aim tuh DIE here all trussed up like some blamed Thanksgivin' TURKEY!"
- Episode 66 - "Only through my POWERS OF MIND did I ESCAPE..."
- Episode 67 - "Careful with those thorns, hon."
- Episode 68 - "Now you're a REAL junkie!"
- Episode 69 - "Cut the happy jazz, huh?"
- Episode 70 - The two one-legged girls attract the curious...
- Episode 71 - "?"
- Episode 72 - "By volunteering for this test you've made a remarkable contribution to SPACE MEDICINE."
- Episode 73 - "WAAAUGH"
- Episode 74 - "...and you shall accomplish what lesser men would term MIRACLES."
- Episode 75 - "Tarim's teeth!"
- Episode 76 - "You would prepare HORSE FEED for an earth-pig born?"
- Episode 77 - "NOW what?"
- Episode 78 - "I've heard you're pretty much the Devil incarnate."
- Episode 79 - "And...you are...?"
- Episode 80 - "SUPERGIRL!"
- Episode 81 - "I can be as nasty as I want!"
- Episode 82 - "And who's this ugly little monster?"
- Episode 83 - She had read an article in the ITALIAN EDITION OF VOGUE on FOOT-BINDING IN THE ORIENT which had really struck home with her!
- Episode 84 - And thus was born this WEIRD AVENGRESS OF THE NIGHT!
- Episode 85 - "You see, kids, Tavi will come back and STEP on us, you see."
- Episode 86 - "I KNOW ALL--AND ALL I KNOW, I HATE!"
- Episode 87 - "Have you any IDEA what it's like explaining to people that you're NOT a robot?"
- Episode 88 - "Send me into the dark, and I will live again."
- Episode 89 - "He could cause snowstorms and make little girls grow beards."
- Episode 90 - "Possession by space-ghosts?"
- Episode 91 - "Oh, now THIS is just stupid."
- Episode 92 - "Oooh, that makes me simply FURIOUS!"
- Episode 93 - "We love you, and Jesus does too."
- Episode 94 - "Highway SAFETY films, man!"
- Episode 95 - "Jenifer, NO!"
- Episode 96 - "Your right leg was utterly delightful..."
- Episode 97 - "Mmmm...the WOUND is still FRESH!"
- Episode 98 - "I could be GIRL FRANKENSTEIN."
- Episode 99 - "The fire inside her will be put out!"
- Episode 100 - "PHASE ONE complete."
- Episode 101 - "And who are YOU to swear by Ymir?"
- Episode 102 - "But I'll WARM you--warm you with the FIRE in my OWN BLOOD--"
- Episode 103 - "I tell you, the bird lies!"
- Episode 104 - "THE Mortimer Money?"
- Episode 105 - "Only one of us can be the Lone Ranger."
- Episode 106 - "Does Loch Lomond have bonnie banks?"
- Episode 107 - "This, folks, is SPLEUNKING in STYLE!"
- Episode 108 - "You've flipped your SUNBONNET, man!"
- Episode 109 - "Holy Harkov!"
- Episode 110 - FIN FANG FOOM!
- Episode 111 - "The freedom-loving traitors must be seized and punished!"
- Episode 112 - "They mean the sky-demons from Mars, who hurl long-range, disintegrating super-bombs!"
- Episode 113 - "I'll kill your mother and then find you and I'll cut off one of your furry, tick-ridden legs."
- Episode 114 - "I'm talking new, improved zombies."
- Episode 115 - "Just don't ask where I was when I heard about J.F.K."
- Episode 116 - "In the fast food restaurant of LIFE--Dolores was a CHEESEBURGER DELUXE."
- Episode 117 - "You should have a sign: 'NO ONE UNDER 41 ADMITTED WITHOUT PARENTAL CONSENT.'"
- Episode 118 - Courtney vs. the Symbiote
- Episode 119 - Courtney vs. the Symbiote 2: Electric Boogaloo
- Episode 120 - Courtney vs. the Symbiote 3: Dream Warriors
- Episode 121 - Courtney vs. the Symbiote: The Final Chapter
- Episode 122 - "Surrender, Doctor, and face your Dalek masters."
- Episode 123 - "DETONATE THE REALITY BOMB!"
- Episode 124 - "Feeling no pain..."
- Episode 125 - "We cannot solve our sadness."
- Episode 126 - "So if I did a Nintendo thing called 'Flying Chainsaw Jesus' I'd be rich?"
- Episode 127 - "Score one for the Afro!"
- Episode 128 - "Because I want you to BEG for it, bitch!"
- Episode 129 - "Underneath all this, I'm still the same old CORPSE."
- Episode 130 - "We're crazy superstar mutants!"
- Episode 131 - "Daddy'll take good care of you..."
- Episode 132 - "But she must be at least EIGHTEEN YEARS OLD!"
- Episode 133 - It did seem like such a WASTE, though, for the female to EAT the male afterwards.
- Episode 134 - "Besides, I kinda LIKE seeing you get your uppity on, Emp."
- Episode 135 - "That WAS quite badass...!"
- Episode 136 - "Elissa, (SOMEHOW) you accessed OBJECT 524 (verboten, verboten, VERBOTEN)...!"
- Episode 137 - "HMMM."
- Episode 138 - "IIIII II II III IIIII"
- Episode 139 - "Case still open..."
- Episode 140 - LUKE CAGE AIN'T GLEN CAMPBELL.
- Episode 141 - "We're READY for your kind!"
- Episode 142 - "Some baby!"
- Episode 143 - "I'll look the dame over all I pleases!"
- Episode 144 - "Good-bye, cruel world!"
- Episode 145 - She now belonged to another society, another world; a world of pot, LSD and free love.
- Episode 146 - "I just didn't think a DUCK could make me feel that way!"
- Episode 147 - "But if he don't unglue his eyes from yer mammaries, I'll--!"
- "Episode 148 - "Just for once shut up and KISS me, huh?"
- Episode 149 - "My name is MORONICA!"
- Episode 150 - "I didn't do a lot of crime-fighting in those first few weeks."
- Episode 151 - "Let's cut his BALLS off!"
- Episode 152 - "Okay, you cunts."
- Episode 153 - "Knife in the nuts?"
- Episode 154 - "I got Kevlar down to my UNDEROOS, dickhead."
- Episode 155 - "Is that COCAINE?"
- Episode 156 - Courtney vs. the Evil Dead
- Episode 157 - Courtney vs. the Evil Dead 2
- Episode 158 - Courtney vs. the Evil Dead 3
- Episode 159 - Courtney vs. the Evil Dead 4
- Episode 160 - "DIRTY JEW!"
- Episode 161 - "Hear them cheer!"
- Episode 162 - Hail Satan! V
- Episode 163 - "Don't faint with gratitude!"
- Episode 164 - "I bestow the BELT!"
32 Comments:
Where would these cubs be on your pussy meter? Between Goth and Emo?
TCM, I have to side with Starhawk on this one, the kid is racist. He has nightmares where blacks are demons? He's horrified that he might become Chinese.
Starhawk, I have to side with TCM on this one, you should trust that TCM knows how 6 year old girls talk when they encounter a guy in a ski mask.
I used to work at Saks in the 90's, doormen were available during promotions and when requested. On the 6th floor, in the "classy" mens room was a old black bathroom attendant. He was in there all the time.
Can't you pick something more recent to show racism in the US exist. The Jena Six, Oscar Grant, president Obama and the Tea Baggers.
We talked about Madame Xanadu in episode 143, I said it was okay and I didn't understand why you liked it. I don't hate it.
I saw that video, I think they are just slightly above emo because werewolves are supposed to be agressive right?
Oh I forgot to mention hipsters. Remarkabley difficult to define but when I see one I just have to kill them.
They didn't always have colour TV? I thought black and white was an artistic choice.
I have to admit, Madame Xanadu sound quite interesting, I might just have to check it out.
I listened to this episode whilst drawing uniform designs for my army to wear when I conquer the world. It's a turqouise and grey colour scheme, something edgy and modern to contrast the classic shapes I'm going with.
Courtney/Xantes, as far as werewolves, I don't think there was an issue of Werewolf by Night that went by without Jack Russell whining about how he wanted to kill himself, so I say they're emo.
Xantes, considering Marvel had already turned Dr. Druid Asian (actual dialogue: "My eyes! They're becoming slanted!") and Psylocke Japanese for no apparent reason, it's not like the kid's panic is entirely unjustified.
What kind of asshole would actually request a doorman?! And I suspect that "bathroom attendant" wasn't actually working for Saks...
I can't believe the whole Tea Bagger thing hasn't imploded yet. Then again, it does validate everything I've ever said about this country being overrun with blithering idiots.
I hope my Xanadu review at least explained why I think it's a good book, then. Also, the fact that Geoff "Hacky McHackBoy" Johns' Green Lantern outsells Xanadu by a better than 10-to-1 ratio proves not only are we surrounded by idiots, but they all apparently buy comics.
Courtney, you can tell a hipster by the fact they only learn just enough about whatever they're pretending to be into to come off as "hip", but crumble under questioning:
Hipster: "Oh yeah, I love the Velvet Underground! The banana album's a classic!"
Normal person: "True enough; so what's your favorite VU record besides that one?"
Hipster: "..."
Do they even make black and white TVs anymore? And if so, why?!
Thank you for that line about the Xanadu review; if I encouraged anyone to check out a good comic that nobody's reading, I've done my good deed for 2010. Now I can go back to being evil for the rest of the year.
Is your army gonna have that stylized "CC" logo you sign your artwork with on their armbands, their hats, or will you just brand it on their foreheads?
Damn, was that too predictable? Yeah they wear my logo on their peaked caps.
The lining of their garments have the logo on it too, kind of like what Guess and Chanel do in their handbags.
Rich assholes like Lagerfeld, Hilfiger, Trump.
Tea bagger thing has imploded, many times, but they are so desperate.
No, you didn't mention that the Phantom Stranger fucked over Xanadu.
Courtney, are you ever gonna write your own Mein Kampf?
Courtney, I think you're gonna keep coming up with new stuff just to put off making that White Queen costume since you know that's what we're all really looking forward to seeing.
Xantes, I wasn't even thinking about Phantom Stranger; fucked her over? He spent like ten issues basically telling her to stop being such a dumbass and listen to the voice of reason (i.e. him.) To paraphrase Stranger in MX #8, "Yeah, all those bitches Jack the Ripper's killed? Your fault, bitch!"
I'm not putting it off, I still need to find white tights and mum has to recut the fringe on my white wig.
Also, uniform designs are on my DeviantART now.
Clearly, the fact that you can't find the right tights just proves you were destined to go with panties instead!
It's freaking freezing over here right now, so don't expect any Emma Frost pictures any time soon.
Although I will be getting those Evil Dead photos taken on Saturday.
When are those episodes airing anyway? 2012?
Also I looked up the weather in Philly and it only gets to about 35 degrees celcius. You freaking pussy, it gets up to 45 degrees over here with either no wind or alot of humidity.
Nipple-hardening freezing weather is exactly when a girl should be exposing herself on camera or whatever! Why chicks don't wear tube tops and such in the middle of winter, I have no idea.
As you know, I wanted to air those episodes as #146-149, but you insisted that I wait until you'd taken your photos. Which I remain skeptical about, especially since you just bitched about it being too cold to take sexy pictures!
I don't know what web site's lying to you that we top out at 35 degrees Celsius since apparently that's 95 degrees Fahrenheit (as we measure temperature here in the civilized world), which is just a typical summer day here. We actually "top out" at 102-104 degrees or so, since that's what it hit in Philly earlier this month and with our own humidity and lack of wind added to that, we're pretty much talking what it must feel like on the surface of planet Mercury. We're not one of those spoiled countries like Australia that gets to have a nice, cool winter in July!
http://www.cnn.com/2010/US/07/07/heat.wave/index.html
What's the deal with hard nipples? Why is is a source of fascination for so many men?
Don't get your hopes up for ever seeing mine, I only own padded bras and the Emma Frost costume involves a thick corset.
Anyway, what did you think of my unform designs?
So why can't you take those Emma Frost pix inside? Hard nipples are an indication that women are horny, which we men like seeing even if it's a false positive due to cold weather.
It's been that hot up here in the Northeast? Good thing I am a civilized man and I don't have to expose myself to the outside.
I like your pic with the minotaur, but I don't understand her feet.
Uh no, that's a myth. They just go hard because it cold or they have been aggitated.
Who says I'm taking those photos outside? It's still cool inside. Houses aren't magical structures that are completely immune to outside conditions.
Plus I have no air conditioning in my room.
You don't understand her feet? What's not to understand? They're boney things what goes on the end of an ankle aint it?
Anyway, I'd really like Podcast X to branch out to a wider audience.
I was looking on That Guy With the Glasses and they're always looking for new talent.
What say I shoot off an email and see if we can be involved?
???
???......????
Huh? How can you....? What do you mean...? Myth?!? So you have not experienced this biological occurrence? Or witnesses it? Test it out for yourself. Lock yourself topless (to avoid any material from agitating the nipples) in your room, check your nipples for softness then watch or do something that gets you horny and check for softness again.
What kind of material do they use to build houses in Australia, straw and mud? Yes, building and houses can be immune to outside weather conditions. Our subway cars are immune to outside weather, except when they open the doors.
Courtney, re: What's the deal with hard nipples? Why is is a source of fascination for so many men? The fact that you actually find this to be a great mystery proves that you might be the one female in human history to have been born with no lesbian urges whatsoever. Or at least that's what you want us all to think.
Your mention of padded bras (which greet the friendly male gaze with a hostile response of "don't even try to check these out, you bastard!" just reminded me to mention in advance of your photoshoot: Ash never wore a bra! Just saying.
The only questionable thing about those uniform designs are the turquoise bits, as I'd be surprised if there's ever been a real military uniform sporting so much of a bright color like that; although given that this is your world-conquering army, you could just have your guys shoot anyone who had a problem with their outfits anyway.
Pfft, if I wanted to be on a video podcast, PCX would already be one itself. Mind you, there's nothing stopping you from doing anything with those guys such as, as I've sorta suggested before, a show with Nostalgia Chick where the two of you would be naked and making out with each other.
Xantes, yeah, I often think Courtney's ironically hot "I'm so innocent" routine is a total act, but then she'll make the occasional comment like the one about girls' nipples never getting hard because they're horny (Your "???" being exactly the correct response to that!) and I have to wonder.
Military dress uniform can be so colorful and bizarre.
Okay, I have to apologize to Courtney, maybe her nipples don't harden when horny, but it does happen. I've never met a female, in certain situations, whose nipples didn't harden with a little bit of stimulation. I checked around online and some females don't have nipples that harden and I was talking to a female friend who admitted it doesn't happen to her.
No, not video podcasts. Just upload our show onto their site so we can get comments from more than three people.
I think they also get paid too.
"The fact that you actually find this to be a great mystery proves that you might be the one female in human history to have been born with no lesbian urges whatsoever."
Heh, I hardly have sexual urges at all. Usually I'm just artistically attracted to someone (or something) and I will enjoy drawing it over and over again.
But the concept of sex doesn't really enter my mind.
So yeah, never had my nipples do that because I don't think I've ever been aroused.
Now for something completely different. I watched The Reader yesterday. Shithouse movie, but the worst part was Kate Winslett's boobs.
I mean she looked terrible in that movie, then she got naked and she had saggy tits with GIANT nipples!
Definitley not the same as she was in Titanic.
I also watched Beyond Thunderdome, I love the first two Mad Max's but Mel's a total cunt these days so I couldn't enjoy that movie. Not that it was any good in it's own right anyway.
And then I watched Coraline, I got five minutes in and she started singing and she had an annoying sidekick and I was all like 'I'm out'.
Neil's books are perfect the way they are and no movie has ever topped them. Although Mirrormask was close.
Xantes, I haven't seen a military outfit like that since the one on that guy who wouldn't let Dorothy into Emerald City.
More importantly, since Courtney implied that her nipples do get hard when it's cold, I think there's hope for her.
Courtney, Tim used to upload his show onto the Comic Book Noise site. Ask him some time how well that worked out for him.
Bitches should never choose to age, so that was Ms. Winslet's first mistake; even worse was her decision to have kids because that's usually the point where a chick gets stuck with a "mom body" for the rest of her life. Oookay, I just saw stills from The Reader and now I'm just sad. I thought it couldn't get any more depressing than when Jennifer Connelly hit the wall.
Actually, I hope Mel Gibson sinks so low that he asks to be on Podcast X just so I can turn him down. And you know you just didn't want to like the Coraline movie! Speaking of Gaiman, what I really hope Hollywood never tries to make (and I know they inevitably will) is a Sandman movie. I can see it now: directed by Michael Bay, rated PG-13 and starring Megan Fox as Death...
I just saw Coraline, the girl sort of reminded me of a certain female co-host. The musical numbers weren't like spontaneous numbers, they were music bits being used by the Other Mother to entice the little girl to stay in her realm. I don't remember Coraline singing though.
Jennifer Connelly hasn't made a movie since Dark City and she was cute in that.
The Vatican Guard
Greeks, it's what they are
I need some feathers, a birthing/bondage chair with leather restraints, a predator rubber suit, a robot arm, a cd of eerie space sounds, a ball gag, a sensory deprivation helmet and I'll learn them nipples.
You kidding me? She's been in plenty of movies since Dark City. Although the only one I watched recently was the Day The Earth Stood Still.
Which superhero do dogs prefer?:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GrIp3k5pJQM
I admit I related to Coraline quite a bit. A quiet, bright and imaginative child who spends most of her time alone and is rather accepting when reality changes around her.
The best thing about Coraline is that unlike all these "Shut up and take your prozac, kids - be happy (or else)!" bullshit kids' movies out there, this story was so unashamedly dark it could have been written by Neil Gai-- oh, wait.
Maybe all these goofy military outfits are a good idea. Who'd wanna go join the army or whatever if you'd have to dress like that every day?
Y'know, I just remembered how Isabella Rossellini's turned into her own grandmother and suddenly I have a whole new respect for how Winslet and Connelly have held up compared to whatever happened there...!
I refuse to believe that. That must be her mom.
Terrifying, isn't it? Behold the ravages of age! (Yes, I stole that line from The Simpsons but only 'cause it's so appropriate here.)
And re: Courtney's YouTube clip - It's no surprise that a lower form of life (dogs being the "special ed" students of the animal kingdom) would be a big fan of Batman.
I thought goldfish were the special ed students of the kingdom?
Goldfish are special ed of the sea kingdom.
I must now go and deny everything said about Jennifer and watch Labyrinth, and imagine the true story behind it, which is- it's all a young underage girl's masturbatory dream.
Oh goddamn, was she gorgeous in that movie. And of course, the fact she came thisclose to just letting the Goblin King have his way with her proves that every underage girl secretly longs to be raped by an older man.
Hmmm. With all of Courtney's xeno-fetishes, I wonder which one of her likes she would willingly give one of her brother to. The Beast, Darkness, Jareth, a predator? I think her brothers are living on borrowed time.
Dylan, yes, that fat fuck is just a sacrifical lamb in waiting.
Jordan on the other hand is my BFF.
So when the zombie apocalypse happens, guess which one I'm throwing out the back of the truck to slow the zombies down?
What's disturbing is that she's actually thought this out.
What do you mean, doesn't everyone have a zombie plan and order of sacrifice?
Um...sure! I was just, er, kidding...
PCX: The Classics Tour.
Good thing StarHawk isn't a cop,
-I like to report a mugging
-Can you describe them?
-Yes, they are young and black and h--
-Excuse me! What does the color of their skin have to do with anything?
-I, uh, I'm just describing them. They were black.
-Really? Could they have just been off-white?
Actually Dave being able to remove his suit while in so much pain should show how crazy he is.
Spiders, wonder if that Cure song Lullaby was running in his head while he was fading in and out in the hospital bed?
Or maybe they look younger to represent their innocence and maybe also their dorkiness. Nerds usually seem younger.
What's wrong with saving kitty-cats? Superman rescued one from a tree after saving Lois and stopping a few crimes, he can't "downgrade"? Plus in the comic they thought they were going to save a baby.
They stopped using black doormen the moment Starhawk was born.
My post 911 reaction, "its the goddamn Jews' fault." And I actually told one that when he was going on about how in Israel they would have been prepared for the Timothy McVeight type who must have done it. And I said something this big must have been done by the Arabs pissed off at Jews. Tried calling me anti-Semitic, I said it was reality and to check with me in a couple of days to see who's right.
Bet the wife does swallow for diamonds.
This is the swinging 20's, thin was in.
If only baby lesbians...
I seriously like Psylocke before she became thin and Asian, I liked her with the big hair and big butt.
The Teabagger movement seems to be imploding now. Most of the followers left once they figured out there were too many racists or because the movement was sponsored by the mega-rich.
Telling her to stop being a dumb-ass? How by speaking in vague terms. Is he talking about her lover, her job or her choice in shampoo.
Tube tops and such in the middle of winter? Yeah women do wear them in the winter but usually on for special occasions like Halloween and New Year's Eve.
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